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The Myth of God’s Perfect Choice (GPC)

I know this entry might sound heretical to most of my Christian readers because we have been so accustomed to hear preachers talk about GPC ( God’s perfect choice) for our lives. Women for the longest time waits for their GPC to come. Men have tried so much to be the GPC of the girl they want.

I don’t know where we got the idea of GPC. Who invented it and if the term really is valid. Here is a question posted on my formspring account that validates the phenomena of the God’s Perfect Choice Theology or “THE ONE”

hi pastor, there’s this guy who has been upfront about his feelings for me, thing is, i don’t feel anything for him. He is a christian. How would I know if he is the guy that God planned for me? I’m afraid I’m letting go of “the one”

How will I know if HE IS THE ONE?

To tell you honestly, we will never know “THE ONE”. We are not OMNISCIENT to know. Now God might try to confirm it through His word, other godly people in your life but to be sure of God’s perfect choice – I doubt if we really will know and I doubt if there is such a thing as God’s Perfect Choice. Here is why I think GPC is a myth:

1. LOVE IS A DECISION.

When I courted Thammie, I didn’t know if she was the one. The only time I knew she was the one was when the pastor said I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU MAN AND WIFE. There are also days that a spouse might look at the person he/she has married and doubt whether the person was God’s perfect choice for him/her but they remain in their marriage and build their marriage because their love is not based on a feeling or emotion or a spiritual gut feel but a decision.

2. The Scripture shows us that we were not the perfect candidate for the AGAPE kind of love.

We were not GPC when it comes to our relationship with God. In fact we were sinners worthy of death and hell but what did God do. He loved us ( my point#1) and gave His Son Jesus to die for us. Labeling someone as GPC is putting too much expectations. Thammie didn’t know if I was GPC for her but she made a decision to love me and she credits the grace of God to submit under my leadership – why? Because I am not PERFECT!!! Same thing with me – Thammie might be beautiful but she is not perfect. There were crazy expectations I had in our first few years of marriage. In my mind, if she really was my GPC – this should not be happening but that is where we experienced the grace and the love of God.

3. How in the world would you know your GPC or if he/she is the ONE?

We can’t. We are too finite to know. We can only trust God. Now there are guidelines that we follow to choose the person we are going to marry but once the decision is made – you can’t undo it.

I have talked to hurting women who thought that the guy that pursued and love them was GPC. After getting married, the man that was supposed to be GPC transformed.  What happened to the man that I married? He became God’s Perfect Curse!!!!

It goes back to the decision we made. Stick with your decision to love the man/woman you chose- his imperfections, stupidity and pimples unless there is an abuse going on that deserves the intervention of the church and the government.

4. Is it really God’s list or your list?

Some people wait for their GPC to show up till the day they die. The reason is that they already made a list of their own preferences. I asked a girl what time what she was looking for in a man. She said, “He must be sensitive, always listening, will take care of me, caring, thoughtful, loving, kind and etc”… After describing to me her GPC, I concluded that the perfect man is a woman.

 

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Dennis Sy

Dennis Sy is the editor in chief of Act Like a Man and the Senior Pastor of Victory Greenhills. Husband to Thammie Sy, and father to three wonderful kids. You can follow his tweets @DennisSy or follow him in Facebook. Dennis is also the author of the best selling book, " Rich for Life: Secrets of Those Who Stayed Rich for Life and How You Can be One

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