Chinkee Tan on Men Saying NO

Taking Manhood Back

Chinkee Tan on Men Saying NO

We live in a world where there is full of temptation, sin and compromise, that it is the more accepted way to live rather than living and doing the right thing. Because we are so afraid that people would laughed, ridiculed, scoffed or even tease us for being holy or righteous. There is a stronger tendency for us to succumb to peer pressure and to do the wrong things rather than doing the right things. So one of the toughest for real men is to say “No!”

But praise be to God, that He promised us once He leaves us that He will leave us a powerful spirit that can guide and empower us to overcome any temptation, sin or compromise.

On Titus 2:12, “It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age.”

God did not leave us here on earth to live Defeated Christian Lives but God called us to live Victorious Christian Lives. So if we are empowered by God with this power, we should use it as a weapon against the enemy. What then should real men do or say?

Real men know how to say “NO!” to the following:


My friend for over 10 years of being a Christian has no struggle at all with temptation. I asked him what his secret was. His reply was “Simple, whenever I experience temptation, I give in.” Way to go champ!

Well, we all know that is not the proper way to confront temptation. We should run away or flee from the first sign of temptation just like what Joseph did against Potiphar’s wife. He applied God’s instruction on 2 Timothy 2:22 ‘Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.’

God has taught us to pray so that we would not be lead into temptation but there are times, that we lead ourselves into the path where temptation is present. The best away to say “No!” to temptation is to stay away from it.  If you have struggles with drinking and women, stay away from bars. If you have weaknesses with internet porn, never surf the net alone in a private place, surf in a place where you can be visibly seen. If you have problems with smoking, stay away from people who smoke.

We should learn how to run and stay away from the first sign of temptation. Because that is the wise thing to do.


Before we talk about compromising, we need to first understand the definition of the word compromise. It is to make concessions or accommodations for someone who does not agree with a prevalent set of standards or rules. God is very clear with His instructions so that we need not bend or condone compromising standard.

God want us to have life to the fullest. That is the reason why He is guiding us specially in choosing our life long partner. He then gave instructions to us believers that when choosing our partners “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” (2 Cor. 6:14)

But what does our inner desire dictates? “I think this is the partner you are waiting for?” “If you let this opportunity pass by, I do not think you can get married.” “Anyway, you can bring the person to church and will soon come to know God.” Our mind start rationalizing and convincing ourselves that it is okay and you are doing this to win a soul for God, but in reality we are already compromising. I have counseled numerous cases that from after being married to a person whose life is not totally surrendered to God. They are now reaping heart aches and pains for the seed of compromised they have sown in the past.


Is it possible for us to stop sinning?

The answer must be a convincing “Yes” for all Christ followers. If we believed that Jesus died for our sins and has been crucified on the cross 2000 years ago, why do we still allow sin it to rule and reign in our mind, will and emotions?  If Jesus commanded us to sin no more and has given us the victory including all we need to succeed at this command, then we have no excuse and no other option than to aggressively kill sin by God’s amazing grace. We can do ALL things through Christ who gives us strength.

This is great news! So let us embrace the promise of God through His Son Jesus that we should no longer give in to sin in our lives.  Just say no to sin.

No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God’s seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God. – 1 John 3:9

God has taught us to say “NO!”
So real men should learn how to say “NO!”

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