Three Traits of My Ideal Man
We feature this month our ongoing series WHAT WOMEN WANT MEN TO KNOW. We have guest blogger Krisette Capati
Do you really want to know what’s inside a woman’s mind? What makes them cringe and fidget in delight?
Fashion, tea parties, shopping, chitchats, bags, makeup and dramas… they love these things; but not one of these can satisfy the deepest longing of their soul.
Meanwhile, basketball, cars, outdoors, adventures, and action-packed movies are the things that men love. However, these wouldn’t satisfy too the deepest desire of their soul.
Something’s missing here.
Blaise Pascal called it a “God-shaped hole”. No matter how different you are; even if men came from Mars and women from Venus (as Dr. John Gray puts it), the heart is set for eternity and only with God can they fully understand the purpose of why they were created.
I will attempt to unwire the cords, straighten the thread and disclose what’s inside a god-fearing woman’s mind. Just a bit of disclaimer here: not every woman would prefer these traits, since each has her own opinion and mindset.
• Man with firm principles but “subjective to certain situations”.
Let’s take the example of King Xerxes and Queen Esther’s relationship. One thing that knocks me out of my feet is a man with firm principles but remains subjective to certain situations that needed major decisions.
The king has only one rule: “Any man or woman who goes into the inner court to the king, who has not been called, he has but one law: put all to death.” (Esther 4:11 NKJV)
You know the story. Queen Esther found favor in the king’s sight. I believe King Xerxes is a man of integrity, a man with firm principles, (he’s a king, of course!), but because of his intimacy with Esther, the temperature of their relationship (which is on its highest degree!) melted his heart that he accepted her presence and extended the golden scepter, instead of putting her to death. Whew!
• Man who listens intently but honest enough to agree or disagree.
Women love to talk. It’s not because they want your attention. They want to be heard through sincere conversations that build rock solid relationships. Women believe open communication cultivates a healthy relationship.
King Xerxes listened to her queen’s requests. It wasn’t just once, but Esther requested twice for the banquet of wine. He could have an idea what’s in her mind, but King Xerxes choose to listen intently to her queen’s plea and was honest enough to say yes to continue to the second banquet of wine.
The next time a woman ask you to hear her requests, take time to listen intently and be honest about it. Women can tell by your body language and facial expression. Refrain from going in circles. If you’re not interested to the ideas presented, tell them in a nice way, rather than merely hearing and pretending you are hooked to the conversation.
• Man of few words but initiates action in the right time.
According to the adage, “action speaks louder than words,” women are attracted to a man of few words, yet aggressively takes actions in the right place and time.
When King Xerxes found out the enemy was with him, he didn’t say a word. Instead, “the king arose in his wrath from the banquet of wine and went into the palace garden.” (Esther 7:7 NKJV)
He didn’t say anything, but he composed himself, and took action in the right time against the man who threatened his beloved queen. He didn’t fight Haman face-to-face. He cautiously executed his plan of action.
You know the story. The king commanded his eunuch to hang the adversary.
But there’s a greater King than Xerxes, a King who’s the perfect model for all men out there – Jesus.
A man of action develops trust and assurance to women whose hearts are pursued by Him.
So if you’re pursuing a woman who is totally crazy in love with Jesus, make sure your heart is set right before Jesus.
Does a man with such traits exist? I believe there is. What do you think?