The problem with most of the style of dating and courtship that men make is that they try to hard sell themselves. You are trying to convince the girl that you are the best man for her. You try so hard to put your best foot forward.
You bring her to a very expensive restaurant which you can’t afford.
You try to change your personality to woo her.
You try to hide your weakness and show only your good side.
The problem with this tactic is that your true colors will eventually show.
In the future, she will ask why you don’t bring her to that fancy restaurant and discover you really can’t afford it.
She tries to force you to be someone who you are not because she thought you are who you pretended to be before. She thought you were funny when you are actually serious, she thought you love watching romantic movies when you actually dread it, she thought you are the dream boy that you project when in reality you will be her worst nightmare because you acted as if you need to sell yourself.
Please note that I am not saying that you adjust some of your ways. What I am saying is that you need to be authentic to her yet at the same time willing to adjust and compromise on certain things to make the relationship work.
Instead of selling yourself, why don’t you be the YOU who could eventually be the future significant other of the woman you want to marry.
Be significant by preparing yourself to be the man whom God has called to lead the relationship.
Be significant to her by treating her with significance and authenticity.