We have been talking about masculinity for the past few days. I’m not talking about a regimen to make your physical muscles bigger but rather your role as men – fathers, husband, provider. So what is masculinity. Let me take the definition given by Douglas Wilson on his book Father Hunger: Why God Calls Men to Love and Lead Their Families which I highly recommend you buy.
Simply put, masculinity is the glad assumption of sacrificial responsibility. A man who assumes responsibility is learning masculinity and a culture that encourages men to take responsibility is a culture that is a friend to masculinity.
Is there a glad assumption on our part to be masculine men by taking sacrificial responsibility. As a boyfriend, do I treat my girlfriend with respect, value and dignity or do I defile her and manipulate her to get what I want? As a husband, do I lovingly lead my wife, love her and listen to her or do I use my muscles to lord it over her? As a father, do I provide loving leadership and guidance or do I exasperate my children? Something for us to think about.
Another thing to think about is the culture where we live in. The movies that we watch portrays men as cheaters, lazy, bums and sex addicts. Most of our working environment delegates men to hide under the cubicle. Our churches and school have emasculated men. There is a growing movement to take gender out of the vocabulary. Even the liberal movement are fighting for equality of gender when the issue is not equality but gender roles. Same sex marriage laws are trying to make its way in the Philippine constitution. As we continue that route, we are creating a culture that is not a friend to real masculinity. The rise of visionless men, absentee fathers and sex crazed men are a reflection of the culture we are trying to build.
It’s time we stop pampering our men and tell them to shape up. It’s time we take a step and tell our fathers to get out of their comfort zone and provide for their family. It’s time for women to actually be empowered to be mothers and let their husbands take the role as provider and leader of the family. It’s time we become deliberate as a church to reach out to men and not create an environment where we are afraid to invite men to church.