A lot of people are asking, “If I love right, is there a possibility that I will still get hurt? Now if this was me before – the idealistic single, i might say no but after 9 years of marriage and thousands of mistakes made that hurt my wife in spite of my good intentions (kuno), I can say that to love is to be vulnerable. That means I have to get naked emotionally also. My wife will get to see the good and bad in me. And I know some of the things that will be exposed because we live together in one roof might hurt her but I think that is all part of the process of loving someone.
You love someone not because he is lovable. Love is tested when we don’t feel like loving someone. Love is tested as it goes through the fire.
“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” ― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
Are you willing to be vulnerable? That is the way of love!