He says, She says …. A blog about fathers …. and fathers-in-law

Taking Manhood Back

He says, She says …. A blog about fathers …. and fathers-in-law

By: Ryan & Karren Carnero

dingRyan: I grew up with Ding, a very disciplined man when it comes to work and finances. I won’t claim to be rich, but I guess, one of the perks of being an only child is being well-provided. He gave me the chance to travel at a very young age. He sent me to good schools. As a young, married, struggling physician, he waited until I could fly. He gave us a nest where we could nurse our own little one.  Yes, I’ve been living for almost 10 years in a house I constructed with my dad for my family.

Karren: I grew up with Quiel, a very loving and giving dad. Okay, call him a spoiler. I guess, one of the perks of growing up with a father who grew up not having everything is he would always try to give you everything. And everything, for my dad, is not about things; it’s about time, affection and devotion, not only to me, but to my daughter as well.

Ryan: Let’s get down to the meat of this blog. I met Quiel through Karren. I say he’s a hard act to follow. They say the hardest woman to marry is she who has a king for a dad …. he calls her daughter ‘princess.’ Eleven years of being married to his princess taught me the following: 1) You cannot go wrong with too much time for your kids; they grow up too fast. 2) It’s not wrong to be emotional around them because when they see what’s inside of you, they will never be afraid to show who they really are.

Karren: I met Ding through Ryan. I thought he is rather tough & firm.  To better picture my impression of him, please add ‘too’ before tough and firm. A decade after being part of their family, this man has taught me 1) everything I know about finances. The only person I have encountered who lives by this equation: income – savings (60%) = expenses (40%). Initially, I’d go what???!!! But seeing how stress-free and comfortable his life is at the age of 72, I’d say it’s worth a try. 2) You have to be tough at times. It teaches your children resilience & patience. It’s not always green pasture out there. Most of the time, our kids need to walk through the woods and we can’t always be there for them.

daddy quielRyan: To my father-in-law, Quiel, thank you for being around. Your continued devotion to your family, with me included, taught me to put my family first, next to God.

Karren: To my father in law, Ding, thank you for the pep talks. Thank you for helping us launch, for teaching us how to aim high, but to be content with little.

Ryan: Fatherhood is intentional. It is a God-given role. It is something we have to be best at because we are answerable to God.

Karren: Our fathers are God’s representative on earth.  Sometimes we do not see that in them, but honor them just the same. By doing that, we tap on the opportunity to be fathered by God, Himself and we become entitled to His promise.

Ephesians 6: 1-4 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Happy Father’s Day, Ding, Quiel & all the fathers out there. Happy Dad’s Day, Father God. We love you.